Introduction: Stories Change Culture
Policies matter. Training matters. But culture shifts when we hear real stories.
It’s easy for gender-based violence (GBV) to feel abstract until it has a face and a name — until you hear the voice of someone who lived through it. Stories connect the head to the heart, and they remind us why this work isn’t just a box to tick.
At Capyble, we work with organisations across Australia to prevent and respond to GBV in the workplace. Over the years, we’ve heard hundreds of stories — from employees, leaders, and survivors. Today we want to share a few of them (de-identified and composite) to protect privacy, but faithful to the truths they reveal.
Story 1: The Casual Worker Who Stayed Silent
“I didn’t report it because I couldn’t afford to lose my shifts.”
This was the reality for Sophie, a hospitality worker. After several weeks of unwanted comments and physical contact from a senior colleague, Sophie stopped picking up extra shifts. Her income dropped, and so did her confidence.
When she finally told her manager what was happening, she was offered a new roster — but no investigation was launched. The harasser remained employed. Sophie left the industry within six months, convinced that no one would ever take her seriously.
What We Learned
- Precarious work amplifies risk. Casual and contract staff may feel they have no power to speak up.
- Visible follow-through matters. Without consequences for harmful behaviour, reporting feels pointless.
- Support needs to be proactive. Sophie needed reassurance before she disclosed that she wouldn’t lose work for speaking out.
Story 2: The Bystander Who Froze
“I saw what was happening — but I didn’t know what to do.”
This came from Daniel, a mid-level engineer who witnessed a colleague making sexually suggestive comments to a junior employee during a work event. Daniel wanted to intervene but wasn’t sure what to say in the moment. Later, he felt guilty and avoided both colleagues altogether.
What We Learned
- Bystanders need tools. Many employees want to do the right thing but freeze because they fear escalation or backlash.
- Training builds confidence. Simple scripts like, “Hey, that’s not appropriate,” or “Let’s change the subject,” empower bystanders to act.
- Culture shapes courage. When leadership models intervention, others feel safer following suit.
Story 3: The Manager Who Stepped Up
“I realised I was the first person she had ever told.”
Leanne, a warehouse supervisor, noticed one of her team members was unusually withdrawn. After gently checking in, the employee disclosed she was experiencing family violence and feared her partner might show up at work.
Leanne contacted HR, who helped develop a safety plan — adjusting shift times, alerting security, and providing paid leave for court dates. The employee stayed safe and continued working. Months later, she told Leanne: “You saved my job and maybe my life.”
What We Learned
- Managers are first responders. Their response can determine whether someone feels supported or further traumatised.
- Safety planning saves lives. Small adjustments (like parking in a well-lit area) can make a huge difference.
- Compassion is a skill. Leanne didn’t need to be an expert — just willing to listen and act.
Why Survivor-Informed Practice Matters
These stories underline why survivor-informed practice is essential. When workplaces consult with people who’ve experienced GBV, they design better systems.
Key Principles of Survivor-Informed Practice
- Choice & Control: Allow employees to choose how, when, and to whom they disclose.
- Confidentiality: Share information only on a need-to-know basis.
- Safety First: Prioritise immediate and ongoing safety over procedural convenience.
- Respectful Language: Avoid blaming language like “Why didn’t you report sooner?”
- Flexibility: Recognise that healing is non-linear — support may be needed for months or years.
The Gap Between Policy and Reality
Many organisations have policies that look good on paper but fail in practice. Workers tell us they:
- Don’t trust complaints will be taken seriously
- Fear being labelled a troublemaker
- Have seen past incidents “swept under the rug”
- Worry about retaliation or career damage
Closing this gap requires more than compliance — it requires listening. Anonymous surveys, listening sessions, and focus groups can surface hidden barriers and give leaders insight into what employees actually need.
Intersectionality: Not All Experiences Are the Same
GBV doesn’t affect everyone equally. Our clients have shared stories highlighting how gender, race, sexuality, and disability intersect.
- Migrant women may face language barriers or visa-related threats.
- LGBTQ+ workers may experience harassment tied to both gender and sexuality.
- Workers with disability may be more vulnerable to coercion or have fewer reporting options.
An inclusive approach ensures policies and training acknowledge these different experiences and meet diverse needs.
Practical Steps to Gather Stories Safely
If you’re a leader or HR professional reading this, you might be thinking: “We want to hear our employees’ stories — but how do we do it without causing harm?”
Here’s how:
- Engage an External Facilitator: This creates psychological safety and helps protect anonymity.
- Set Ground Rules: Confidentiality, respect, and the right to pass on any question.
- Offer Support Resources: Ensure counselling or EAP is available before, during, and after.
- Focus on Learning, Not Details: Ask about what would have made the experience safer, not the trauma itself.
- Close the Loop: Share back what you heard and what actions you will take — so employees know their voice made a difference.
The Emotional Impact — And the Hope
Hearing stories of GBV can be confronting. But it can also be galvanising. Many leaders tell us that after listening to employees, they feel a deeper sense of purpose and urgency.
And there’s good news: workplaces can be part of the solution. When employees see that their stories lead to real change — stronger policies, safer spaces, more respectful behaviour — trust grows.
This is how we transform workplaces from sites of harm to sites of healing.
Call to Action: Become a Listening Organisation
You don’t need to wait for a major incident to start listening. Begin now:
- Run an anonymous survey.
- Host a voluntary listening circle with a skilled facilitator.
- Train leaders in trauma-informed communication.
- Share back what you learned and what you’ll do next.
The courage to listen is the first step to lasting change.
Conclusion: Culture Shifts When People Are Heard
The stories we’ve shared today are difficult — but they’re also instructive. They remind us that GBV is not a theoretical risk but a lived reality for many workers.
When workplaces choose to listen deeply, they send a powerful message: Your safety matters. Your story matters. You matter.
And when that message is genuine, it doesn’t just prevent harm — it builds the kind of culture where everyone can thrive.
The challenge for every organisation is not just to write policies or run training, but to create the conditions where stories can be safely told and acted upon. That is where transformation begins.
